You’re More Creative Than You Think

How a Little Panic and Honest Feedback Can Spark a Lot of Creativity

If you’ve ever stared at a blank screen, a blank wall, or a blank dinner plan at 5:27 p.m. and thought, “Why am I not more creative?”—please know this: you’re not boring. You’re just human. And also probably tired.

In Chapter 7 of Smarter, Faster, Better, Charles Duhigg talks about creativity and innovation, and here’s the good news: while you can’t force creativity on demand (phew), you can create the conditions that make it much more likely to show up.

It’s less “lightning strike from the heavens,” and more “set the table, light the candle, and invite it over.”

And as moms? We’re actually better at this than we think.

1. Start with Your Own Story

One of the first things Duhigg points out is that creativity starts with paying attention—to your own thoughts, your own reactions, your own life.

We tend to think creative people are out there chasing wild adventures and big stories. But the truth is, we each carry around a unique mash-up of experiences that no one else has. Military base or small town. Four kids or one. Career, caregiving, or some chaotic combination of both. All of it forms a lens that is totally yours.

You become more creative when you stop trying to borrow everyone else’s story and start mining your own.

Sharing someone else’s story is where we slide into cliché at best or plagiarism at worst. The people we hail as “innovators” aren’t usually discovering brand-new ingredients; they’re just better at combining the ones they already have.

It’s like Mexican food: same handful of ingredients—beans, cheese, tortillas, salsa—but somehow you end up with twenty-six different delicious menu options.

Decorating your house? Writing a work proposal? Starting a podcast? Figuring out how to teach your kids algebra without crying? Stop trying to do it like everyone else on Instagram. Take what you’ve lived, what you’ve learned, what others have taught you, plus whatever you’re learning now—and combine it into something new.

You don’t need a cooler life. You just need to pay better attention to the one you already have.

2. Invite Critical Feedback

Here’s the truth: we are terrible judges of our own work.

I learned this the hard way when I was in the thick of editing my first book. I chose to send each chapter to my editor as I finished it, which felt smart at the time and later just felt vulnerable.

She would send it back covered in digital comment bubbles:
“I don’t think you’re as clear here as you could be.”
“I’m not sure what you mean by this.”

After spending hours writing and rewriting, those little bubbles did not feel lovely.

But once I embraced her role—not as the Destroyer of My Feelings and Written Work, but as a creative partner whose entire job was to make the book better—I started to welcome the discomfort. Each question forced me to clarify what I really meant and to say it in a way that sounded more like me.

The same thing happened when I recorded my audiobook. The producer sat on the other side of the glass, following along as I read. At one point he said, “I’m not sure that’s how that word is pronounced.”

It was a word I had used my entire life. I was sure I had it right. He was pretty sure I did not. So, like professionals, we did what all highly trained experts do: we Googled it.

Turns out, I was right (hallelujah), but we both walked away better for having asked the question instead of just barreling ahead in our assumptions.

Creativity needs that kind of distance and disturbance. Someone who can say, “I don’t think this means what you think it means,” or “You can go deeper here.” It’s uncomfortable—but it’s where the good stuff happens.

3. Create a Little Panic

Here’s a surprising truth: creativity likes a little bit of panic.

Not full-scale, melt-down-in-the-shower panic, but optimal stress—that sweet spot where you’re just uncomfortable enough to try something new.

Deadlines do this for me. Left to my own timeline, I can procrastinate forever. Add a due date from a publisher or coworker, and suddenly I’m wildly productive and slightly over-caffeinated. That mild panic keeps me focused and weirdly more creative.

I saw this in an even more tangible way when we lived on Kwajalein, where there were few stores, limited supplies, and Amazon deliveries that took anywhere from 3–8 weeks. Need a new holiday centerpiece? A thoughtful gift? Wrapping paper?

Too bad. Figure it out.

I started repurposing what we had: shells and coconuts on tables, brown grocery bags as wrapping paper, handmade gifts from the Hobby Shop. My creativity didn’t grow because I decided, “I shall now become more creative.” It grew because it had to.

Duhigg calls this “creative desperation”—the kind of low-level anxiety that pushes us to see old ideas in new ways. It’s uncomfortable, but it’s also incredibly productive.

You’re More Creative Than You Think

Here’s the best news: creativity isn’t a personality trait, it’s a process—which means it’s something you can grow. As a mom, you’re already a professional problem solver, jerry-rigging schedules, dinners, carpools, and emotions into something that mostly works on a daily basis. That’s not just survival; that’s creativity. The ideas are already in you—you just have to trust yourself enough to let them out.

Where will you get creative today?